Friday, January 28, 2005
Colin: So when are we moving?
Kip: I have no idea.
Colin: Any rumors?
Kip: The only rumor I know of is the one I started.
Graffiti: ’One weekend a month’, my ass!
Colin: [nodding to the newly arrived replacement Soldier] Harold, have you met the new guy?
Harold: I was his RA at ESU. I got him in the Guard. I ****ed him good, huh? I said, ‘Come to drill, it’s fun!’”
Marty: Remember at Dix when they told us that walking in the snow was just like walking in the sand?
SGT: [briefing our relief on our sector] There’s a Gurkha in that tower, so don’t waste him.
Colin: [After ranting about Kip being taken advantage of and then trying to preempt his patent response] And don’t say, “It’s all good,” because it’s not.
Kip: It’s all tolerable.
Soldier: [sincerely] To be honest with you, I don’t like Arabs.
Colin: I’m getting fat.
Reed: Colin, I love you anyway. You’re like the inbred half stepchild I never wanted.
Iraqi man in car at road block: Thank you for not shooting me.
Clean: [referring to Kip giving unwanted carepackage items to the Colonel (Iraqi Army, Retired) ] Kip is taking away from American Soldiers and giving to the Hajjis.
Colin: [appealing to Clean's God fearing side] What does Jesus think about that?
Kip: Jesus was a hajji.
Colin: Yes, I guess he was in the way we use the word. We could say Jesus was a rag head. Adam and Eve were definitely rag heads.
Clean: And see how they ****ed up the world?
Kip: He paid a Hajji to install the door. He got jew’d so bad!
Colin: Jew’d by a Hajji?
Colin: So, Sleepy, looking back on the deployment, what’s the biggest thing you’ve learned?
Sleepy: Don’t volunteer for anything.
Kip: [in reference to the rigorous NCO at the Post Office] You gotta be careful about the female E6 there.
Colin: The one that looks like a crack whore?
Kip: Yep.
Colin: [reading an article] The DOD urinalysis test can find THC in your urine for three weeks after you've smoked a joint.
Soldier: That’s why cocaine is the way to go.
Platoon SGT: Are you going to put those on somebody’s bed?
Colin: [caught holding a box of feminine hygiene products] I was going to, SGT.
Platoon SGT: OK, just checking.
Clean: [briefing us] … and just know that if they need your blood, they will take it.
Bud: Uh oh, don’t tell Judge that.
Clean: [trying to assure me] Oh, of course, the blood will be going to another Soldier.
Colin: ***k the Soldier, I want my blood to go to a Hajji.
Colin: [wondering why Clean didn’t come right out and say we were getting a break from our leader] So, is it a secret that Phil is going on the advance?
Clean: No, I said it like that so people would have to think about it for even just a little while, in order to avoid a spontaneous outburst.
Kip: I have no idea.
Colin: Any rumors?
Kip: The only rumor I know of is the one I started.
Graffiti: ’One weekend a month’, my ass!
Colin: [nodding to the newly arrived replacement Soldier] Harold, have you met the new guy?
Harold: I was his RA at ESU. I got him in the Guard. I ****ed him good, huh? I said, ‘Come to drill, it’s fun!’”
Marty: Remember at Dix when they told us that walking in the snow was just like walking in the sand?
SGT: [briefing our relief on our sector] There’s a Gurkha in that tower, so don’t waste him.
Colin: [After ranting about Kip being taken advantage of and then trying to preempt his patent response] And don’t say, “It’s all good,” because it’s not.
Kip: It’s all tolerable.
Soldier: [sincerely] To be honest with you, I don’t like Arabs.
Colin: I’m getting fat.
Reed: Colin, I love you anyway. You’re like the inbred half stepchild I never wanted.
Iraqi man in car at road block: Thank you for not shooting me.
Clean: [referring to Kip giving unwanted carepackage items to the Colonel (Iraqi Army, Retired) ] Kip is taking away from American Soldiers and giving to the Hajjis.
Colin: [appealing to Clean's God fearing side] What does Jesus think about that?
Kip: Jesus was a hajji.
Colin: Yes, I guess he was in the way we use the word. We could say Jesus was a rag head. Adam and Eve were definitely rag heads.
Clean: And see how they ****ed up the world?
Kip: He paid a Hajji to install the door. He got jew’d so bad!
Colin: Jew’d by a Hajji?
Colin: So, Sleepy, looking back on the deployment, what’s the biggest thing you’ve learned?
Sleepy: Don’t volunteer for anything.
Kip: [in reference to the rigorous NCO at the Post Office] You gotta be careful about the female E6 there.
Colin: The one that looks like a crack whore?
Kip: Yep.
Colin: [reading an article] The DOD urinalysis test can find THC in your urine for three weeks after you've smoked a joint.
Soldier: That’s why cocaine is the way to go.
Platoon SGT: Are you going to put those on somebody’s bed?
Colin: [caught holding a box of feminine hygiene products] I was going to, SGT.
Platoon SGT: OK, just checking.
Clean: [briefing us] … and just know that if they need your blood, they will take it.
Bud: Uh oh, don’t tell Judge that.
Clean: [trying to assure me] Oh, of course, the blood will be going to another Soldier.
Colin: ***k the Soldier, I want my blood to go to a Hajji.
Colin: [wondering why Clean didn’t come right out and say we were getting a break from our leader] So, is it a secret that Phil is going on the advance?
Clean: No, I said it like that so people would have to think about it for even just a little while, in order to avoid a spontaneous outburst.
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